Agnes Martin

Agnes Martin in the early 60's, photo by Peter Moore

"To feel confident and successful is not natural for the artist.
To feel insufficient, to experience disappointment and defeat in waiting for inspiration is the natural state of mind for an artist.
As a result, praise to most artists is a little embarrassing.
They cannot take credit for inspiration, for we can see perfectly, but we cannot do perfectly.


Many artists live socially without disturbance to mind, but others must live the inner experience of mind,

a solitary way of living."

Agnes Martin

Painted today

I am trying to just allow things to happen.

these words from my studio wall

I've been doing a huge amount of reading, working on my dissertation proposal. To help figure things out, I've put words and phrases up on the wall but everything is still a haze.

ancient memory
the invisible
time is a material
nostalgia
every day life provides authenticity

Aristotle didn't talk about fear of mice. He went straight to the greatest universal fear, the fear of imminent death, like a passenger in a sinking ship.

uncanny
what lies beyond nature?
traditional technique embraced and transcended
nature's open space, yearning for light
silence

the elephant in the church hall

I hope that you don't mind another circle project update. I have to keep rational thinking out of it and work beyond the fear of the extraordinary time or energy required. Last Thursday we took our tables and chairs and stitched out doors. It was a beautiful day and we had so much fun. In between the Thursday group sessions, I work on the project by myself six hours a day. In progress is 'mended earth', my nickname for the second of four meditation panels that will eventually be installed in the local church. Usually I put in three hours of hand piecing on the horizontal foundations and a fourth hour at the machine making the string fabric.



Then at the church I enjoy two hours of quiet hand quilting on the earth ark panel nearly every day.


There is work worth taking the time to create.
Without rushing.

It raises questions about being that are difficult to articulate.

What does it mean to be alive?
Does anything we do matter?

instantaneous

What I'd like to do this summer is paint every Monday. 9 to 5.
My teaching has stopped, I have a little more time.
But it was really difficult to start. It took me more than an hour of procrastination. I thought - why is this so hard? Just DO it. Treat your painting like you do your stitching - start and see what comes next.

So, I fell back on these marks.

I do feel invigorated. Fresher.

heart to heart

I feel that it's necessary to completely cover a surface with hand stitch. This takes an extra ordinary amount of time. When people ask me "what are you making?" I say "art".
My hand's caress, a lasting mark. I keep stitching until it feels right. Here is the blanket stitch, done with red thread.

Have I made a protective covering or revealed an open wound?

painting with stitch

I may be finished with this stitched piece. I'm not sure, but I think so. Maybe it's a vessel.

Earlier view? click here. And here.

Anchorage Museum

The Anchorage Museum has recently had a beautiful addition and rennovation done. We enjoyed the Smithsonian collection of Alaskan historic work. I was blown away by the waterproof parkas made from seal intestine.It was the transparency of the material and the care in the hand work. The horizontal lines dictated by the material itself. Also loved the basket work made from grass.

grand mother hand work

We live quite far away from these babes, and it is a real pleasure to spend time with them both. The 8 month old lets me feed him, and so does the nearly 4 year old, in a different way.

grand boys

We are visiting family in Anchorage this weekend.



Busy watching boulders being jumped off of, thresholds being crossed.

That's about it.

circle project

The project is a large circle made from horizontal bands of tiny pieces. It is made by hand sewing tapes of pieced fabric with back stitch onto a foundation. We need to use two needles, one for sewing the work firmly with a back stitch, and the second for mending split seams and attaching a new tape. The tapes are cut as needed from previously pieced string fabric made from damask tablecloths and silk. I love the process, the inherent metaphor of mending the earth. It's slow however, and I've been doing a lot of sewing on this piece at home, so that it is less daunting for the project participants. I hope to get a sheet of mended earth finished before we fly to Anchorage to see our grand boys. Even though I won't be there this Thursday, the project will go ahead. It happens every Thursday. I'll be back on the 17th. There are two projects actually. Hand quilting of the earth ark panel continues.

cottage reading

We opened the cottage over the weekend and I was given time to read. I feel lifted into another place.
I almost believe in it.

Ann Hamilton by Joan Simon
Memory on Clothby Yoshiko Iwamoto Wada
The Sublime, Documents of Contemporary Art edited by Simon Morley

"O I perceive after all so many uttering tongues
And I perceive they do not come from the roofs of mouths for nothing."
Walt Whitman Leaves of Grass

990 Queen Street West

My black dress piece will be included in AWARD WINNERS 2010 at the Ontario Craft Council Gallery in Toronto this June and July.

I regret that I wasn't able to attend the awards presentation and opening of the exhibition yesterday. The other work in the show is in a variety of fine craft media like glass, clay, and wood as well as textiles. I am proud to have been one of the 27 artists selected.

My particular award was a scholarship to continue my fine art degree with the Julia Caprara School of Textile Arts /Middlesex University in the UK.

The last painting class

Tuesday was my last 'creative painting in water based media' class and I am glad that it is over. I found that creating lessons that introduced the three media (ink, acrylic, watercolour),covered basic and innovative painting skills PLUS pushed the participants towards their personal voice was really difficult.I've been stitching for the last few years, not painting.I thought that teaching painting would inspire me to do more of it, but I only painted when preparing to teach. These are some of my recent demonstration or preparation watercolours. The most I will say about them, is that they are different from the way I used to paint.